Mordantly Fecund

"I need time to grieve."-- Allison Joseph

Not all New Wave cinema is necessarily an accurate representation, and Liza Minnelli's video worn recycle The Sterile Cuckoo  is a dated antiquity, which, memories of Garland's biography like episodic flash cards in the comparison, led me to look on Minnelli's performance as an exploration of mother's emotional pain, with a light hearted side. Liza is not her mother-- though her capital comes from Judy's passion, a heart which transcends the avant garde which surrounds Judy's overdose and death. That Pokey is hostile to homosexual codex would lead mortally wounded souls to wonder that gay pride activists don't get the sturdy network vehicle taken off the air.

When I saw Allison's picture, realized she might have read my powerful essay about the scars of inner city living, and my sparse, but nevertheless substantial communiques with her over the years, my rage against diversity being forced down my throat, I shriveled with an OMG moment, having made apparently erroneous assumptions about her ethnicity. Usually, when she communicates to the list en masse, I normally join in with perfuse accolades and praise, which are sincere despite my class conflicts here in the dungeon, but when she announced a death in the family, I quelled the urge to join in with digital comfort, because all I've ever had with her are one-sided conversations. What we generate in epistomological contexts simply through research--not that I am able to judge whether I've caused her offense. I used to assert I was biased, at first, and I've since graduated-- but my reasons for this are simple. Integration, in principle, has an abstract, noble liberal sentiment. Reality is something else, and I applaud the courage of Nicholas Wade, though of course, he would shun me for being deliberately rude, sometimes hotly vitriolic-- the fact remains, however, that Allison has the luxury of her reticence and commitment to helping writers. I live with the fear of being exterminated by women like Trudy Richardson on the one hand, and inner city women who need to indulge their own comfort in exploiting me, or going through more trauma through urban crime. 

Allison could say she is vulnerable as well. Being a minority academic is no guarantee of indemnity--, but she has a salary, the security of tenure, and I bust my hump for peanuts.